How do I put a message on here?
Type something into the box. Click the 'Submit' button. That's it.

What messages can I put up here?
Anything you like. Any subject at all. We're rather hoping you won't be inciting race hatred or explaining how to make a high-yield nuclear device, mind.

Where are the guidelines on use of this message board?
Here, on the guidelines page.

How do I reply to a message?
Simply click on the 'replies' link below the message, which will take you to a page showing all replies to that message.

How long can my message be?
We limit messages to 1500 characters. The form won't accept over 1500 characters. If you force it, you'll get a pop-up message saying you've gone over that. Unless you're using Netscape4 in which case frankly you deserve everything you get, and we just don't have time for you.

How do I add my name?
Put it in the box, along with the rest of your message. At the end, maybe.

How long will my message stay up here?
As long as possible, but it will depend how many other people post messages after you. The more messages get posted, the further down your message will move.

What about obscenity?
We've slapped a simple text parser on here that'll filter out the most offensive Anglo-Saxon terms. That's all. Police yourselves. (Amended Jan 2003: A while back we had to add human moderation - all messages are by default suspended until approval, once they've been read and approved they then show up on the board. Shame, but there you go).

Who do I complain to when I read something on here that offends me?
e-mail us with your complaint. If there's something up here that is genuinely offensive, we'll remove it. But to be honest, we don't intend to take down anything that we don't absolutely have to.

Can I delete a message?
No, but you can e-mail us and ask us to delete it.

Why was my posting disallowed?
Could be one of many reasons. We routinely disallow postings that we think are stupid, in bad taste, offensive, racist, etc. See the guidelines page for more details

How do I complain about my message being disallowed?
If you have a grievance regarding a comment / message that you posted not being approved, please read our notes on being disallowed page before complaining.

Why aren't there usernames, smiley faces, etc?
Because what we're trying to do here is run a message board thats so simple that a goat could use it. With an interface as clean and clear as Google's home page. Most important thing is that absolutely anyone can add a message, with one click, in just 5 seconds. Everything else is secondary. (Amended Jan 2003: We've now added a date stamp and the number of existing replies to the bottom of each message).

How does it work?
Some asp code and a simple database table. Bit of javascript, too. Oh, and a text parser.

Can we have a more complicated message board?
Ah jeez. This is for everyone. The more complicated we make it, the less people can use it. Tell you what: if a whole bunch of you work up the energy to ask (email) for a board with threads and all - we'll think about it. Probably. (Amended Jan 2003: Apart from one request to add the date stamp - now done - nobody has asked for any other changes. Make you think doesn't it? Maybe a clean simple interface with no clutter is what everyone wants).